It Is Not You I Miss

It is not you I miss, but the gap you left me with makes me think of it. I know I am long over you, as I am writing this I can’t even remember your face anymore. It’s funny how the small things that used to mean so much to me no longer matter. Like the sound of your voice; I remember how I would feel at peace just by hearing you during our late night talks.
 
The feeling of being alone is what haunts me. I miss having someone to call mine, I miss the feeling of being in love. And yes, even though I have been broken many times I still hope that someday, I will come across someone who will finally be the one who’s just right.
 
It is not you I miss, but being together completed me. It is not that it defines me, but I know for a fact that love is what makes us whole. The sense of belonging to someone makes one realize that the world is even more beautiful when you have someone you can share it with.
 
It is not you I miss, but love.
 
I’ve forgotten you; it’s been a while and I no longer love you. I have learned to be with myself and I don’t really mind it even if I would end up alone forever. I have hope, though. My heart hopes for another story, maybe another heartbreak; another chance to believe in love again.
 
It is not you I miss, and I think I’ll never do anymore.
 
— It is not you I miss;
I miss the someone I will love next.
 
// hrh
photo: A Walk to Remember

A Judgment of Character

The amazing thing about people is that time doesn’t really measure how much you know them.

It’s confusing to see people you’ve known for years to become a stranger to you.

Or someone you are with to somebody you used to know.

It’s crazy to witness an unmasking of a fear you never really know was there, a pride that was always in its slumbers. A sadness that you have never noticed even through the mirrors of the soul.

Or a laughter that was always behind a poker face. A laughter behind all the anger. Beauty under the darkness.

We cannot blame people for changing, because in most times, they never did change. It’s only about how they have chosen to reveal themselves to you, and how you have managed to unveil them.

Sometimes, it’s about who you are to them and they to you.

// hrh

Icarus and the Sun

I’ve tried to understand how our story went
and now I know
that our love is that of Icarus and the Sun
too blinding, too risky, too deadly-
it was meant to end as fast as it started.

I am the blinding Sun you’ve yearned for years
but you’ve forgotten you’re made of wax
so on the day you finally flew near me
you find yourself melting away slowly

Your promises
Your secrets
Your sincerity
At the end, you walk away like they’re nothing

As I have loved you more, you suffocate
because you become less day by day
While I burn brighter than anything else

I am the Sun
You are Icarus
No matter how much I hold on
I’ll just kill you.

And you have killed me, too
by telling me that those short days
meant nothing to you
and by letting me pretend
that we haven’t shared
a few days of passion
a few days of ecstasy

But on the days after you’ve left
I find myself no longer wishing to be with someone else
And I envy how you seem to be okay
better, even, without me
while I’m getting dimmer
and dimmer
until I fade eventually.

— for the Sun is meant to be alone // hrh

art by: Gabriel Picolo

Fallen Angel

Why are stories of angels
being cast away
were always about them falling in love?
of how they have gazed
upon a face
and felt their souls ache
longing for greater than what is above
Yet, even as they are damned
they would do everything
to protect and save their beloved

They say that being in heaven
is being home
maybe that is why
angels would rather
have their wings stripped off
and fall.

– So please don’t ask me
why I love you more
than I should. // hrh