It Is Not You I Miss

It is not you I miss, but the gap you left me with makes me think of it. I know I am long over you, as I am writing this I can’t even remember your face anymore. It’s funny how the small things that used to mean so much to me no longer matter. Like the sound of your voice; I remember how I would feel at peace just by hearing you during our late night talks.
 
The feeling of being alone is what haunts me. I miss having someone to call mine, I miss the feeling of being in love. And yes, even though I have been broken many times I still hope that someday, I will come across someone who will finally be the one who’s just right.
 
It is not you I miss, but being together completed me. It is not that it defines me, but I know for a fact that love is what makes us whole. The sense of belonging to someone makes one realize that the world is even more beautiful when you have someone you can share it with.
 
It is not you I miss, but love.
 
I’ve forgotten you; it’s been a while and I no longer love you. I have learned to be with myself and I don’t really mind it even if I would end up alone forever. I have hope, though. My heart hopes for another story, maybe another heartbreak; another chance to believe in love again.
 
It is not you I miss, and I think I’ll never do anymore.
 
— It is not you I miss;
I miss the someone I will love next.
 
// hrh
photo: A Walk to Remember

A Judgment of Character

The amazing thing about people is that time doesn’t really measure how much you know them.

It’s confusing to see people you’ve known for years to become a stranger to you.

Or someone you are with to somebody you used to know.

It’s crazy to witness an unmasking of a fear you never really know was there, a pride that was always in its slumbers. A sadness that you have never noticed even through the mirrors of the soul.

Or a laughter that was always behind a poker face. A laughter behind all the anger. Beauty under the darkness.

We cannot blame people for changing, because in most times, they never did change. It’s only about how they have chosen to reveal themselves to you, and how you have managed to unveil them.

Sometimes, it’s about who you are to them and they to you.

// hrh

When Should I Trust? Who Should I Trust?

When should I trust? Who should I trust?

Dear Friend,

In a battle, a warrior must guide his own back. There is no one to fully trust, because sometimes, exposing your vulnerability will only mean danger for you.

My friend, in a war where in you are left alone to fight for yourself and the rest of the world, you cannot help but seek for company, for someone who will fight alongside with you. As no man is an island, we are social in nature. We do not just exist, for we coexist with one another.

But why am I saying this?

I think I have to remind you that no one else can fully read your mind but yourself. You alone can understand you, you alone know you, and you alone can change you. Yes, some may have a glimpse of how you act, they may even judge you, but do they know the reason behind why you are such? Do they even care to find out? And if they do, do they understand what it feels like to be you?

I’m afraid they cannot, my friend, because they can never be you the same way you can never be them. We are born with similarities, but we are molded with differences. It is as of how all apples are apples but we taste them in various ways.

So I must say, that even though we are tied in a commitment, you cannot expect anyone to fight your battle for you. They have their own war to win, my friend, expecting much from them will only hurt you.

Love,

// hrh

Fallen Angel

Why are stories of angels
being cast away
were always about them falling in love?
of how they have gazed
upon a face
and felt their souls ache
longing for greater than what is above
Yet, even as they are damned
they would do everything
to protect and save their beloved

They say that being in heaven
is being home
maybe that is why
angels would rather
have their wings stripped off
and fall.

– So please don’t ask me
why I love you more
than I should. // hrh

When You Came

Perhaps you found me
at a time when I was lost
and just beginning to understand
myself again

Perhaps you were
the first light
that I have seen
after being in the dark
for so long

Perhaps you were
just a stranger
with the enough amount of kindness
and a little bit of charm

Regardless of how I have foreseen
you leaving
and how I have long reminded myself
not to fall again
You had me at an impact
and broke my heart
just the same.

And now I’m back to how I was before you came. // hrh

photo: Remember Me

Just Your “Sometimes,” Never Your “Always”

Sometimes you’d surprise me out of nowhere,
ready to spend the day with me
Sometimes your smiles would be meant for me,
and you’d look at me like I was your world
Sometimes, you’d call in the middle of the night
to tell me you miss me
Sometimes you’d look into my eyes
and tell me you love me

While I always wait for you to come,
and you’re the only one my eyes see,
How I always miss you when you’re not with me
and how I always say I love you daily

Because that’s the thing-
I am just your “Sometimes”, never your “Always,”

and I love you too much to be contented with pieces of you
while I give all of me.

– But just this once, I don’t need a “Someday,” I need a “Today.” // hrh